Becoming Resilient part two: Social Creatures
Why it has taken so long to post this
For those who enjoyed the first article and have been wondering when part two was going to come out, well, I wrote it some time ago but was afraid to post it because I was concerned with a potential backlash. Then, this morning, I found the metaphor I needed waiting outside my front door.
Social Creatures
I am not a dog person, but I respect them and get along well with them. So, when I found a german shepherd in the yard, I was first concerned for the chickens, ducks, and rabbits. The dog was not aggressive to us but was too shy to let us get close. She eventually trotted off down the street. I came outside a little while later and found the dog laying near our front door. With some help, she was caught and I sat, with the dog on a leash waiting for animal control to show up. I was surprised to hear the dog snoring. I looked at her sleeping and vulnerable to attack. I thought about how animals who live in social groups are able to do this. The lions of Africa can sleep peacefully knowing that someone else in the group will be watching for danger. Dogs and wolves can sleep knowing that there is someone keeping and eye out for signs of trouble. Humans also form societies in which there is protection and social conventions to safeguard us.
My thought was that this dog could not sleep, and even snore, if there was not the social structure and trust that others would look out for her. As I watch human institutions become less and less trustworthy and many leaders become more and more self-interested, I observe the trust eroding. This is not something that would be a nice bonus feature. Trust is required for humanity. We need to be able to trust others to survive. There is a scene in the famous movie, The Treasure of the Sierra Madre, in which one character becomes selfish and tries to take all the gold for himself. The other is able to prevent him, but eventually he must sleep. Therein lies the crux of the problem. We all are vulnerable at times and need to be able to trust others.
In some areas of the world, much emphasis is put on the rugged individual. In real life, most rugged individuals had others in whom they could trust. They had people they could go to for help. Have you ever known such a person and seen them brought low by a simple illness, like a cold? Even the mightiest person is weak at times. I do not mean to be bashing the rugged individuals for I am one. Instead I am trying to show the need for the group. There have been many times in which I needed people to assist me and I had to find a way to perform a task alone. Often this has been in a work setting in which a job required multiple people and I was not allowed anyone to assist me. I figured out ways to accomplish the task alone, but it often took three times as long. The point is that we all need others, a support system, a circle of trust. We all need it and yet it can be so hard to find.
Having had to do so much alone, I find it hard to ask for help. I find it hard to rely on others. I am working on this. On the other hand, I recognize that we need each other so I try to help others where I can. Here is what we all can do. We can look for opportunities to help one another. Rarely do we see value placed on trust. However, as trust diminishes in the world in general, being a trustworthy individual will become more important. As we see companies and organizations who built their reputations turn around and sell off those trusted reputations, I hope we can learn this simple lesson from a lost dog. We need one another. Caring for one another is how we survive.
This is a video of the dog sleeping. If you listen closely you can hear the snoring. Honestly, it would be more exciting to watch paint dry.
Links to other articles in this series: